Unless you want even more halal chicken shops and barbers open until 3am.
Oh and lower fares on London Transport? Er, I think the facts speak for themselves.
Anybody voting for Ken is a fool. I pity the fool.
So, who then to vote for?
Brian Paddick? No, he’s a Lib Dem so will want to Climate Change Your Ass as well as instigating compulsory anal sex, while dressed as a Metropolitan Police officer!
Jenny Jones? Green? Er, enough said. A bit like Paddick but with less forced anal sex. But more windmills and tofu.
Carlos Cortiglia – BNP. Good British name there for the Uruguay dude. Er, no. BNP = wankbiscuits.
Lawrence Webb – UKIP. Decent chappy. No chance of winning though.
Boris Johnson – Tories. Mental hair. Current incumbent. Bit of a mental tosser. But he’s not as bad as the fuckwit Ken. I honestly think nobody could be – well, perhaps the Yogic Flying nutters.
Talking of which: Ken Livingstone – Labour. Fucking hell. No way. Complete hypocrite, anti-semitic mental wanker. Oh a liar too. Tax dodger and newt fucker (poor things split before he even gets the jollies on!). You want a man who fucks newts up the arse to control your tube? (no doubt he’ll be very keen to see lots of anal sex for small animals and pre-pubescent children) He’s so far up the unions arse that he can see out of their collective and deluded arse.
So, what the fuck am I supposed to do with this bunch of useless twats? I think I’ll write the following letters in my ballot : “WANKS!” or something like that.
Right, that’s enough libel for tonight.
Vote carefully people! It matters!*
*not a fuck, because we are all doomed and ruled by the EUssr anyway.